Insane Inflation Idea

I have an idea that is so stupid and so full of flaws that I am going to propose it as one of my Presidential Platforms. Yes, it is even dumber than 'lock box' and 'fuzzy math'. And unnecessarily complicated to boot.

First things first. While we try to get a handle on inflation it will be necessary to freeze prices exactly where they are. Your hourly wage is now frozen. If salaried, your annual salary is now frozen. Your monthly rent or mortgage payment is now frozen. Monthly utility bills now frozen. Even the price of a loaf of bread, an ice cream cone, or a pack of cigarettes is now frozen. Just have to do it while we get this sorted out.

Next, we move from a 12 month Gregorian year to a 5 month Discordian year. So while you are paying $1k a month for rent (for example) you now only have to pay it five times a year. Same with your credit card bill and your utilities. We also move from a 7 day week to a 5 day week. This means there are only three days between the weekends, and I think we can all handle that a lot better than what we currently got going. There will be 73 days each month, which means 14 weeks each month with 3 'non-days' each month that are national holidays when people are prohibited from working. Stock up on provisions early. Why 73 days? I was born in '73 and like the number. What does this mean for your wages? Assuming the standard 8 hour day, 3 days a week, at $10/hr your monthly income would be $3,360. Under the current antiquated Gregorian system of working 5 days a week you have a monthly income of only $1,680. Not only that, but you only have to work 210 days a year as opposed to about 250, vacations not yet included!

Lastly, all money will be converted to hemp script. That way even if inflation continues along its current trend, you've still got money to burn.