A note to aspiring alcoholics.
Do not ask everyone at the table if they'd like some rum for dessert and within half an hour start acting like you're in a loud and crowded bar. Do not stumble around the room as though you are at a frat party and have forgotten where the keg is. Do not sit at the table next to the supervisors and chuckle loudly about how you had a hell of a time getting the rum from a big jug through the small opening on the flask. Do not make bad jokes about your punch smelling funny. Very amateur.
When sneaking alcohol into a work function, discretely pour under the table and sit quietly with a glazed look in your eyes. Everybody will know what you're doing but won't care. Everyone has had to deal with career alcoholics, usually within their own families. Even if they don't approve, they recognize the actions and are programmed to not do anything about it.
Drunkards get their booze supply cut off. People are scared to take it away from the alcoholic.
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