Abortions for All!

Yes! A chance to talk about one of my favorite topics. Why, just yesterday I was talking with my parents about abortion and now I get to take an opportunity to talk about it some more.

My fellow Americans, now more than ever I am in support of abortion.

Millions Who Had Abortions Don't Know It

The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services has drafted a rule that would call it abortion when a contraceptive prevents a fertilized egg from embedding itself in the uterine wall.

All you gals on the pill are having abortions. All you women with IUDs are having abortions. It is a great time to be alive if you are one of the lucky few who didn't get aborted.

Never mind the medical definition that states the zygote has to actually attach to the uterine wall before it can be considered a pregnancy. Like the hard core religious fundamentalist right-to-lifers I also do not trust doctors. None of them will give me the good meds when I'm in pain. FYI Doc: I pop maybe two pills a year! If I come to you in pain seeking a little comfort, it is because if anyone else felt the way I did they would think they were dieing so just give me the freakin' prescription! Now, where was I?

Under a broad definition of the new rule, my vasectomy prevents zygotes from attaching to uterine walls by preventing eggs from getting fertilized. I am a walking, talking abortion clinic! Awesome.

Some folks are troubled by this new rule. They say it will be used to deny women access to contraception. Which in the short term it might. I am in favor of it in as much as I am in favor of abortions. I also think this is exactly the kind of theocratic bullshit that pushes the issue over the top. If you call contraception abortion, suddenly abortion doesn't seem so frightening. Psychologically it makes the pro-life arguments impotent. It aborts them.