Learning Tolerance

Some things in plant maintenance are real slap dash, grab a wrench, hit there, pull this kinds of things. But we do some fairly precise work, too.

For instance, today I had to move a 200 lb. spinner head 1/1000" back and 5/10000" to the right. To accomplish this task I was given two micrometers, a 9/16" socket wrench, and a lead hammer. If we didn't have this close of a tolerance, the rivets on the saw chain we make would give out in about a tenth of the normal life expectancy. Compared with that, my graphic design layouts might as well have been slapped together by a monkey, and any mistake there would not result in the possible loss of life or limb.

On another project, I had to put on a new plate for a spinning parts bowl. This has a tolerance up to 5/1000". before the bowl doesn;t spin right and the parts will jam in it. Using a spinning micrometer and two hex wrenchs I managed to get the entire radius of the plate within 2/1000". with just two passes around.

But this stuff is all just child's play. We're the slap-dash maintenance out on the floor. The big boys in back have got it rough. Most of the stuff they make must meet a tolerance of about 1/10000" or less.

So today I learned that tolerance does not always mean being more accepting.

AWPC

Tim: Did you cut yourself?

Me: I don't think so.

Tim: There's blood on the spin plate.

Me: Oh. Yeah. I guess I did.

I'm Peach!

A friend sent me a link to http://www.ImpeachBush.org/.

I say, Impeach ALL Politicians!

Drug Test Lotto

Thursday was "Random Pee Day" at work. It's that day when the folks in the office pick people at random, have them urinate in a small plastic cup, and if they screw it up, they get fired.

Let's put aside that Reagan's Nazi Regime implemented this and made certain that it was all nice and legal despite it's obvious violation (IMHO) of the 4th Amendment of the US Constitution. Especially considering that to win a government contract you have to have a drug testing policy in place. But that's all another issue. Let's just forget about that for a moment.

What if, along side the punishments for failing, they gave out prizes for passing? Give employees a reason to actually want their name drawn in order to remove some of the negative connotations associated with random drug testing. I suggest a weekend in British Columbia or an all expenses paid trip to Amsterdam.

X

Think "beach volleyball meets J. Edgar Hoover" and you'll be extremely misguided.

Swede Transvestite

The "Fucking" Chorus

I don't swear a lot. Hardly at all, really. I have no objections to profanity and even think that most people need to really lighten up about the whole thing. So why does it bother me when some of the people at work say "fuck" constantly?

Repetition! Expand your vocabulary. Talking with you gets boring when a full third of the conversation consists of just one word.

Exhibit A:

I went to the freaky park and saw a freaky freak there that freaked my freaky mind. Freaky freaks freak with me.

See? The sentence can make total sense, but it's repetitiveness blurs the brain.

So fucking stop with the fucking repetition you fucking fucked up fucks!

WTF?

There were rumors of the maintenance nightmare known as "packaging". I had heard tell of how maintenance would get called there to fix one problem and then get stuck with three or four things that suddenly "popped up". And I had heard a tale of how they had been called to packaging just to adjust a chair's height.

My first day training in maintenance today. We got called to packaging. The first problem got fixed quick. Then someone asked us to adjust their chair. Then three more problems "popped up".

Journal Entry

I've journaled for several years now. I have over a dozen volumes of the stuff. But for once, I want to share something that I journaled the other day. It says a lot about how I feel right now. Here goes...

I like getting dirty at work. I like the oil and coolant and the funky industrial smells of the factory. I like the filth under my nails and the cuts on my fingers. I like going out to public places without showering after work, smelling like a 'working man'. Now I get to move into maintenance and make machines run. I can honestly say, That Is Fucking COOL! I love it! I really do. All through my childhood people acknowledged my intelligence and creativity and tried to push me into a more professional track. But this, this I love. And right now I feel really good about moving out west and starting over. I may need money, but I feel good about who I am and what I do. And I feel happy that I figured this out fairly early on in my life. And I feel glad that I worked the office scene first so that I can truly appreciate what I've got now. I'm a dirty, smelly, working man.

Hookers on Stilts

Some may have noticed the addition of a link to the right.

She looks super sexy in a plaid skirt. She can make middle aged immigrant men willingly give up loads of cash and booze. She has more issues than Time Magazine. Surprisingly, she isn't a Portland stripper.

Keeping up with Hookers on Stilts is one of my dirty little secrets. I suppose now that it's no longer secret, it's just dirty.

Don't Make Me!

So you goddamn blog comment spammers want a piece of me? Come on, mother fucker, COME ON!!! I'll delete every last piece of your crap. The comments section will remain and I'll rip you up.

If you're going to comment, comment. Don't say "ooo, nice blog, check mine out." Bullocks to that. Instead say, "Hurray for guns! Hurray for dope! Hurray for freedom and the government not getting involved where it doesn't belong." You blog spammers got the grapes for that? Huh? Huh?

Come on ya pansies!

Don't make me speak L33+

The Freedom Fight

On the gun scene, No Guns For People Wishing to Protect Themselves from Looters or Forced Evacuation by Government Authorities.

On the dope scene, Medical Marijuana Laws Don't Make Teens Into Pot Smoking Hippies.

I've sworn off news. Really. But it keeps seeking me out.

That Long?

I haven't set foot in my home state for a couple of years now. Now the time has come for a return visit. My sister has made plans to get married on October 22nd and I get to officiate! WOOT!

For those of you still living in Canadia Expatria (aka. Minnesota), we need to make plans to exchange pleasantries and insults. I'll have very limited time available, so you all have to share. Remember your Sesame Street lessons? Good. Regardless, if you wish to see me during my trip back, you should contact me so I don't inadvertently miss anyone. It will probably take shape as a bar gathering of some sort, quite possibly at the CC Club.

And if anyone out there wants to get me a gift (my birthday occurs the week before my visit), I have this strange desire for a First Ave t-shirt. In Minneapolis they make you look like a total poser. Out here, nobody knows. And I like to think that I can fool most people into thinking I'm not a poser.

So let's get together and shoot the shit, chew the fat, rub some elbows, and maybe even spend some time reminding each other how much better we are than everybody else. Because you know what (insert your name here)? I like you. You're not like the other people, here, in the trailer park.

Joe Bob Bat

British Bats Are Hillbillys.

What Every Kid Needs to Know About Sex

The absolute worst sex I have ever had, still put a smile on my face.

Now go practice abstinence or some such.

Sex Education

Time for me to espouse more of my personal opinions on things that other people seem to really give a shit about.

Let's talk about sex education. Kids need some form of sex education other than "don't do it, son" or the total cop out of "wait until you're married". Those answers just don't cut it. And the stuff that passes for sex ed in schools. Damn! It amazes me how in a semester long course a teacher can tell you all about sexually transmitted diseases, masturbation, and pregnancy without ever showing pictures of genitalia other than internal mechanistic diagrams.

So this is my plan for kids to learn all about sex and still delay having sex for as long as possible. PARENTS! Tell your kids EVERYTHING about your sex life from the first time up to the present day. Explain it in vivid detail guaranteed to produce technicolor nightmares for years. Your children imagining you having sex will delay the inevitable for at least three years. And when they do get around to it, they'll have genuine, anecdotal knowledge. What 12 year old hormonally horny boy really wants to hear about your experimentation with dildos and butt plugs? He'll listen, in fear, horrified at what he is hearing, too scared to run away. And if you want to show them what sex is without breaking out the home video, make certain to rent films made for those with a taste for 'mature' individuals. Hell, they might swear themselves to celibacy right then and there.

Changes

I won't be grinding saw chain after this next week. They replaced me. Instead I will be joining the maintenance crew, fixing the machines that make and grind the chain. I feel pretty freakin' cool about that.

One Man, Two Women!

Screw the "Traditional Family".

Embryo With Two Mothers Approved

Non-traditional breeding has advantages.

No News IS Good News

For nearly two weeks now I have not read, listened to, or watched any news source other than science news and local weather. So that means for a little over a week now everybody has told me all about the goings ons in New Orleans.

I feel like an old farmer who gets all his news by going to the local cafe every day for lunch and talking with the locals. His entire world view gets formed by what other people think and tell him about current events. Except I can see this taking place. I saw the same phenomenon taking place with standard news sources. A reporter will either write from their personal vantage point, or learn to write from their editor's vantage point. Likely their editor will have the vantage point of the owners. It leaks through. Most news stories in a standard, metropolitan, daily, all have the same feel and betray a similar bias. I wouldn't call it liberal or conservative. The best descriptor I can come up with? Business Casual. What does news sound like coming from friends, family, coworkers, and vociferous strangers? Listen to an eight-year-old tell you about the last movie they watched. Now layer it with heavy opinions usually criticizing the government, a broader vocabulary, and some profanity thrown in for good measure. Yeah, something like that.

And it sounds better. These 'news sources' know that they have chosen to interpret events. They don't feign impartiality. They tell you not what they heard or saw but how what they heard and saw affected them.

And in the last week I have seen awe, anger, sorrow, and something I can only describe as hollow disbelief, not in a negative way, but as one would expect from trying to comprehend something so unfathomable.

Best of all, I didn't waste any time on news. Oh, and I guess the Middle East has remained pretty fucked up, too.

The Big Teat

All around me I have heard talk about the devastation of New Orleans and the failure of the governments (local, state, and federal) to respond in a timely and appropriate fashion. In other words, people look at government not just as the authoritarian figure that tells us what we can and cannot do, trying to poke it's nose into all of our business. People have never seemed to like the masculine aspects of government. This disaster has shown that Americans also think of their governments as the mother. When things go wrong they expect the government to come sweeping in and make everything better. You know, apply some bandages, kiss some owies, and give you a big bowl of chicken noodle soup. And when the government didn't do that, people felt abandoned, orphaned.

Thus I maintain my position as an Anarchist. Reliance on organizations of any kind will lead to disaster. To the best of your ability, take responsibility for yourself. Those of us who can should help those of us who can't. We should have that as a natural instinct. Preservation of the tribe. For some reason or another, it has gotten washed away.

And now for some truly personal opinion. Those at the bottom end of the pay scale (95% of Americans) should donate time to the efforts. The rest should empty their bank accounts to support those doing the work. My $5.23 (adjusted for inflation in a post-disaster America).

Si

Pura Vida

Disaster

Since I had sworn off news right before Katrina hit New Orleans, I only pick up bits and pieces of what has happened via word of mouth. One of the first things I heard was how my employer got a massive influx for saw chain orders. A similar thing happened when Sweden had a huge wind storm that leveled the better part of a forest. Until working there I had never really thought of how vital saw chain is to disaster clean up. I guess the giant tsunami even boosted the orders.

AWPC

Maintenance Guy: Your bike is so loud. I was standing at the 7-11 and could have sworn you were 20 feet away. I looked and you were already way past the Taco Bell. That thing is loud, but it sounds good.