A guy at work told me, "Having kids is the best thing I've ever done in my life." What a grand accomplishment! The guy manages to get one out of a billion sperm to perform it's biological imperative on three separate occasions. He has managed to bring three more resource consumers into the world. Not having had kids, how could I possibly compare the worth of my life to his? I mean I've only done things like;
- Starred in a short film directed by an Emmy award winning videographer opposite a prime time television actress
- Washed dishes at a small country club
- Had a one act play written about me and performed
- Worked as a security guard
- Have been in three bands
- Butchered and plucked chickens
- Directed stage lighting for a pop band
- Been kicked out of bars
- Organized several music festivals
- Sold designer perfume knock-offs door-to-door
- Built a custom chopper
- Participated in a 'cat trap shoot'
- Received international attention for my assemblage sculpture work
- Repaired hay wagons
- Hosted a weekly radio program
- Dug ditches
- Designed the cover for a best-selling erotic sci-fi novel
- Shampooed hotel carpets
- Abandoned someone else's car in the middle of nowhere
- Was ordained as a minister
- Pissed on the grave of someone I didn't even know
- Received a Doctorate of Divinity
- Shoveled shit twice a day
- Was a shop steward during the largest State Workers Strike in US History
- Scrounged through my room mate's cigarette butts for the half smoked ones
- Guest Lectured at several Universities
- Fell in love
I know, I've lead a pitiful existence. Maybe if I could father a child, if instead of raising cows, pigs, sheep, horses, chickens, ducks, dogs, and cats, I raised a homo-sapien, maybe then I would know a true sense of accomplishment. Maybe if I succumb to the process by which biological forms have propagated their species for millennia, maybe then I could say I've done something worthwhile in my life.
Until then I'll have to just keep writing, drawing, sculpting, filming, playing, and doing whatever else comes along in a vain effort to feel successful.
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1 comment:
I think it's less a commentary on the value of what you've done with your life, than how little that guy has done with his.
I'm not saying that having kids can't be a great accomplishment, but only if that includes raising them to be something other than mindless drones.
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